Wednesday, August 31, 2011

How to Attract Negative Commenters to Your Blog

I have been blogging since 2006 and one of the most interesting things is when this creature called a Troll finds your blog. A Troll is a bored scary little thing that goes through blogs, message boards, and You Tube comments saying mean, evil words creating a fight. If you've never had a troll visit your blog, it is easy to attract one. All you have to do is set a bait. Here is the bait that works the best.

1. Keep a "Conservative" blog. Extra points for being a member of the Tea Party. Trolls hate those who are Conservative and this bait successfully attracts the nastiest of trolls. Bonus points for misspelled words or bad grammer. You will suddenly get a comment about how Bush lied people died etc.

2. Write an anti- Obama post. My page views increased dramatically when I wrote a post against Obama, all were people trolling and questioning your intellect. It might not work as much now. Suddenly people will write comments questioning Bush or Reagan and how racist they are.

3. Write about parenting. The claws come out when you criticize a certain parenting technique or think that natural parenting or the Diaper Genie is stupid. A common comment is how non-progressive and stupid you are, even if you post scientific statistics.

4. Make fun of Twilight or on the other end "artsy literature". I made fun of a novel that had as its hero a lesbian who ran from her family to live her lesbian life. I thought her evil and selfish. I broke a sacred law of the internet and the troll harpies reaped their vengeance on me. That rule is . . .

5. Write anything negative about homosexuality. That is sacred among trolls and they will hunt you down. I once criticized how one television show made sure I saw two men or two women kissing to the point it was annoying. I just thought it anvilicious. I was called "homophobic" and closed minded and that I didn't "get" the show. When I tried to defend myself and explain my comment, I got attacked worse. I "fed" the troll, a huge mistake. 

6. Write about how music today sucks. . . even better how modern art sucks. You will get comments on how the Beatles suck.

7. Write about religion. Even better- write about Creationism! The troll hits hard and low. Don't feed this type of troll. It isn't worth it.

8. Write an anti-Canada post.

9. Write about being a furry. (never tried this one, but according to the internet, no one likes furries)

Set the bait, with you unfortunately being the victim, and watch the negative comments come into your blog. I even once did this as an experiment and I attracted trolls and flamers in no time. (even from my own family!) Good luck!

Another rule- write about these topics even politely in any message board or in comments---------- YOU ARE THE TROLL!

It doesn't matter that you weren't even trying to start a fight- you will be automatically accused of being a troll. Except in certain circles, you cannot be a religious conservative and state your opinion in most message boards or in comments. You will be accused, put on the ignore list, and in some cases banned.

Try it sometime. Go to a news message board, write about the topic making a conservative point and you will be called names that never even reached your imagination. Other way is to say that you plan to use an epidural when you give birth on a parenting message board or that you "gasp" feed your kids McDonald's!! 


  1. You need to be a writer for a newspaper or magazine!

  2. I can't believe you would even think of writing an anti-Canada post!!! Ha ha...