Friday, March 2, 2012

Zuihitsu

I was reading Seiran Shonogen's Pillow Book for the first time in 12 years and read "Things that make the heart flutter". I realized that I don't have anything to list because my heart doesn't have much time to flutter unless I am in the middle of a panic attack. Maybe the modern woman makes things too complicated for herself and is slowly killing her life away.
It is rare that I even notice a hummingbird or a squirrel. I remember receiving a letter used to make my heart flutter but people don't send letters anymore like they used to. Receiving messages from my husband is exciting. I feel like we are in a secret romance though our notes are about paying bills and how the kids are doing. Since he is the only one who shares that information, the notes are still intimate and special. I love that he can send instant messages from Afghanistan where they still have poop ponds to me in Virginia instantly to my phone.
My heart flutters when I add a little bit to my testimony as I read the Scriptures. Meditating on the Scriptures is as relaxing as yoga or a stroll on the beach.
The giant waves of Hawaii used to take my breath away. I would stand on a cliff over looking the ocean watching in awe surfers surfing in waves that were as high as a two story building. At night I would the waves crash under a purple sky. No picture does the beauty of Hawaii justice. Just looking at that beauty is heavenly.
My heart flutters when I walk in a place mg ancestors walked. I get excited around truly ancient objects as if touching them takes me back in time. I teared up in Westminster Abbey and secretly touched the 800 year old tombs and whispered lines from Canterbury Tales over Geoffrey Chaucer 's tomb. My heart rushed when I was just inches from a goblet that belonged to a Medieval king. I could smell and feel the times of where the object came from and the joys and sorrows of the last owner. I felt the mournung of watching a beheading in the Tower of London and the terror one felt at Hampton Court.
I prayed as a child to God with all of my heart that I could travel back in time. My prayers were answered in a strange way. It is history that makes my heart flutter. Right now I just don't have a lot if time for that.

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